Do you ever listen to WKRP? (and other observations of an Ohioan in Massachusetts)

That's my favorite question. I hear it almost every time I tell people I'm from Cincinnati. They say, "Oh how cool! That's where WKRP is, right?" I sadly shake my head, "no." In fact, not only was that show filmed in Los Angeles, but there is no such radio station in Porkopolis. Then they ask, "What's Porkopolis?" And the five minute conversation clearing up all the misconceptions people have about Ohio begins. I release a heavy sigh and continue.

It's okay though, I don't mind explaining that Cincinnati is a real city of over 300,000 people, or that people drive vehicles other than tractors to work. Nor do I mind telling people that I have no idea how the corn is doing this year because I grew up in the suburbs, went to a seriously Catholic school, and studied film in college.

There seems to be a lot of misunderstanding about the way people live in the "flyover states." The first and most glaring error people make is in assuming that everyone in the Midwest is a raging conservative with a hard-on for the GOP. Not true. There are plenty of liberals - you just have to go to colleges and universities, and places where aging hippies have moved. Furthermore, there are actually smart people in these states. It just doesn't show on a national level when you hear election results on a state to state basis. When one hears that Ohio "voted a certain way," one has a tendency to assume that everyone in that state shares a common viewpoint. Again, untrue.

I have been blamed for the election of our current president. Seriously, I have told people I am from Ohio and received a not-so-pleasant response from the politically minded of the Boston area. They say, "Hey, thanks a lot for electing the worst president in history." My response has changed from adamant denial and comiseration, to outright apathy. I'm finished with telling people I didn't vote for Bush, and furthermore, that in a nation where hardly anyone even votes, the American electoral process is worthless anyway.

The most recognizable difference between Cincinnati and Boston (and everyone here will tell you this) is that people here are much much much colder. Hardly anyone acknowledges you as you walk down the street. No one thinks twice about ignoring everyone else around. In short, not very many people are actually genuinely friendly. In addition, the automobile is an even bigger status symbol here. Those who can afford to pay to have an expensive car, insure it, fuel it, and maintain it are looked upon by many with envy. In some cases, women I have met have been very turned off by the fact that I don't drive. These are women who otherwise would find me attractive, smart, and funny, but since I don't have a cool car to drive around, I'm suddenly not good enough. You may feel the urge to rush and correct me: "Oh that's not the way it is Jeff." I welcome correction, but until I see it with my own eyes, until I meet someone who a. wants to go out with me despite my non-driver stauts, and b. is actually friendly, smart, and attractive, I don't think I can belive that such a person exists here. I'm not in a bug hurry to date, though, so I don't feel terrible about it. I just don't cruise the bars like a vulture looking for prey - like many men up here do. My laid back Ohio style isn't conducive to meeting a lot of women, especially in a social climate such as this.

There are many good things about being from the buckeye state though. In my five months of living here, I have met several Ohio ex-pats who have come to the east coast just like me in search of a better life. It's nice to be able to talk about home with them - to wax nostalgic about Skyline Chili, the awful Cincinnati Bengals/Reds/any awful pro sports team, real barbecue, and how we all used to listen to WKRP. So if you talk to me, please keep an open mind. I can be very friendly and personable if I am treated the same way. Just remember not to assume that all Ohioans are Bush-lovin' gun-totin' corn-growin' bumpkins. And the next person who asks me about WKRP gets a new line of questioning about why "Cheers" isn't the way it is on TV, and where I can go to visit the set of "Boston Legal."

Complaints aside, I really do enjoy living here. It's a fantastic city with a lot to offer. I only wish it were easier to meet people without having to be a total douche-bag bar room predator with a slick BMW.