Do you ever listen to WKRP? (and other observations of an Ohioan in Massachusetts)

That's my favorite question. I hear it almost every time I tell people I'm from Cincinnati. They say, "Oh how cool! That's where WKRP is, right?" I sadly shake my head, "no." In fact, not only was that show filmed in Los Angeles, but there is no such radio station in Porkopolis. Then they ask, "What's Porkopolis?" And the five minute conversation clearing up all the misconceptions people have about Ohio begins. I release a heavy sigh and continue.

It's okay though, I don't mind explaining that Cincinnati is a real city of over 300,000 people, or that people drive vehicles other than tractors to work. Nor do I mind telling people that I have no idea how the corn is doing this year because I grew up in the suburbs, went to a seriously Catholic school, and studied film in college.

There seems to be a lot of misunderstanding about the way people live in the "flyover states." The first and most glaring error people make is in assuming that everyone in the Midwest is a raging conservative with a hard-on for the GOP. Not true. There are plenty of liberals - you just have to go to colleges and universities, and places where aging hippies have moved. Furthermore, there are actually smart people in these states. It just doesn't show on a national level when you hear election results on a state to state basis. When one hears that Ohio "voted a certain way," one has a tendency to assume that everyone in that state shares a common viewpoint. Again, untrue.

I have been blamed for the election of our current president. Seriously, I have told people I am from Ohio and received a not-so-pleasant response from the politically minded of the Boston area. They say, "Hey, thanks a lot for electing the worst president in history." My response has changed from adamant denial and comiseration, to outright apathy. I'm finished with telling people I didn't vote for Bush, and furthermore, that in a nation where hardly anyone even votes, the American electoral process is worthless anyway.

The most recognizable difference between Cincinnati and Boston (and everyone here will tell you this) is that people here are much much much colder. Hardly anyone acknowledges you as you walk down the street. No one thinks twice about ignoring everyone else around. In short, not very many people are actually genuinely friendly. In addition, the automobile is an even bigger status symbol here. Those who can afford to pay to have an expensive car, insure it, fuel it, and maintain it are looked upon by many with envy. In some cases, women I have met have been very turned off by the fact that I don't drive. These are women who otherwise would find me attractive, smart, and funny, but since I don't have a cool car to drive around, I'm suddenly not good enough. You may feel the urge to rush and correct me: "Oh that's not the way it is Jeff." I welcome correction, but until I see it with my own eyes, until I meet someone who a. wants to go out with me despite my non-driver stauts, and b. is actually friendly, smart, and attractive, I don't think I can belive that such a person exists here. I'm not in a bug hurry to date, though, so I don't feel terrible about it. I just don't cruise the bars like a vulture looking for prey - like many men up here do. My laid back Ohio style isn't conducive to meeting a lot of women, especially in a social climate such as this.

There are many good things about being from the buckeye state though. In my five months of living here, I have met several Ohio ex-pats who have come to the east coast just like me in search of a better life. It's nice to be able to talk about home with them - to wax nostalgic about Skyline Chili, the awful Cincinnati Bengals/Reds/any awful pro sports team, real barbecue, and how we all used to listen to WKRP. So if you talk to me, please keep an open mind. I can be very friendly and personable if I am treated the same way. Just remember not to assume that all Ohioans are Bush-lovin' gun-totin' corn-growin' bumpkins. And the next person who asks me about WKRP gets a new line of questioning about why "Cheers" isn't the way it is on TV, and where I can go to visit the set of "Boston Legal."

Complaints aside, I really do enjoy living here. It's a fantastic city with a lot to offer. I only wish it were easier to meet people without having to be a total douche-bag bar room predator with a slick BMW.

Be excited: adventures in archiving

You will never believe where this was taken. I realize that I'm repeating myself by bringing out two photos from road trips with Jill White within a few posts of one another, but I just liked this picture so much that I had to go forward with it. It was taken at "Ma and Pa's Antique Store" in (I think) Eaton, Indiana. Jill, if you'd like to chime in here with the correct town name, I'd be much obliged. Otherwise, I'm pretty sure the name started with an "E," so take your pick.

We were driving through this one stoplight town with nothing better to do when we happened upon this shop. Seeing as how the biggest thing in town seemed to be the local gas station, we thought this might be a great place to absorb some local color. We met Ma and Pa themselves, who boasted that they had been born in that town, were high school sweethearts, got married, and never left. There's the happy couple right now:

I simply cannot imagine living in the same town for my entire life like these two have. Even greater, I can't imagine being married to someone for that long. That is a level of commitment that you just don't see very often anymore.

We thanked them for their time and took their photo, but not before purchasing a few things, including the pink Stant mesh and foam trucker hat pictured at the top. We left and went on our way, but a funny thought hit me: I suppose if you collect enough junk and stay alive long enough to sell it as antiques, you can make a business out of virtually nothing. I'd categorize buying stock in a company like Ma and Pa's as an "ultra-long term investment."

Missing Oxford? A response to a simple yet stunning comment

Just a bit, anonymous. Just a bit. If I could live there and remain financially independent, I would, but those two circumstances seem mutually exclusive for someone who doesn't want to do menial labor and live in slum quality housing. Maybe when I become a famous writer I can move back to Oxford (or somewhere similar - maybe Burlington, Vermont) and write from there. The isolation, silence, and darkness are all great for creativity, but I wouldn't want to try to live a normal active life there unless I were a student at Miami, which I am not.

I think I miss the people in Oxford more than the town itself. I had some really great times there with people who are now scattered across the country in places like New York, Massachusetts, Texas, Illinois, and other parts of Ohio such as Kent, Columbus, and Cincinnati. Let's not forget Nate in Japan either.

Lately, I've been feeling a bit more reminiscent than usual about the "good old days" in Oxford. Summers filled with trips to Hueston Woods, College Corner, and Yellow Springs, (m)Eat Fest, frisbee tossing in deserted fields, hiking, biking, and bonding with the friends who stayed in town while everyone else disappeared.

Living in a new city has brought some of these emotions to the forefront of my mind, as I am faced with the reality of making mostly brand new friends, establishing support networks, and dealing with all new places. It's refreshing to live where I am, but I do get misty at times for that old place and time called Oxford, which I know no longer exists, at least in the same way as my memory holds it.

Thinking back on the time I had there, I realize what a confusing four years it really was. I had no idea what I was doing there. I had no real goals, no clear ambition, and a mind that was cracking, ready to shatter. While my time in the "city" of Oxford was wrought with mental turmoil, I did encounter a fantastic group of people who at one point in my life, I considered my whole world.

And now, I have moved on. I left nearly everyone behind as I made a dash for the East Coast. Since I made such a quick exit, I don't think I had enough time to really contemplate the seriousness of a move that would take me 751 miles from my home, and what it might mean for me as a person. Since my move to Boston, I have definitely grown. I have scrapped and saved to create from virtually nothing (I had less than $100 to my name when I moved) a life of financial independence here. Looking back, sometimes I can't believe it myself. In less than a month, I went from two-bit bartender at a mediocre Italian restaurant in Springdale, Ohio to assistant general manager at a 2 million dollar a year restaurant in Boston. Not only that, I have enrolled at Harvard University for fall term classes starting September 19th.

Often, as I walk down the streets of Somerville, I am struck by an awe-inspiring thought, "I live in Massachusetts." While this may not be so awe-inspiring for the approximately six and a half million other residents of the Commonwealth, it still blows my mind. It is even more impressive for me to say, "I'm going home," and for "home" to mean my little apartment just northwest of the great city of Boston, Mass. As I told my roommate, I don't think I'll ever get over the magnificence of this city. I really do love it, and I love living here.

But it's all those old feelings that still get to me sometimes. While I may live in a fantastic new city full of opportunity and new people, I still have a soft spot for Oxford, and the time that has become a quickly disintegrating past. As my friends continue to dissipate through the world, get married, and disappear, it becomes harder and harder to come to terms with the passing of all those good times. I suppose one of the hardest parts of being a human in a universe of constant change is realizing that you are powerless to stop time. All those things you once held dear will turn to dust and disappear. [That was unintentional poetry.] As the unstoppable march of time continues, our once strong memories of special times are chipped away to shards. All we can do is pick up those shards and build new memories with the pieces we have left.

I think the Brian puts the feelings into words quite nicely: "That place feels like the favorite pair of jeans, comfortable and familiar. But closer inspection is unsettling. The faces have changed, new buildings pop up and your friends’ house is no longer your friends’ house." more here. And be sure to check out his post on Metroblogging NYC on being home.


Thanks for the inspiring comment, Anonymous.

Update: Iraqi Constitution Accepted Despite Rumblings From Sunnis

Amid concerns about the insertion of more troops into the Middle East, the constitution of Iraq was begrudgingly accepted by the temporary parliament, despite Sunni leaders' oppostion. The Sunnis fear that the Shia-Kurd proposal which favors federalism and excludes the supporters of the former Baath regime, Saddam's party, will deny them righs to political power and claims to resources. The Sunni leadership also admits fears of racial exclusion brought on by the current constitution.

President Bush is clueless as always: "Of course, there's disagreement," Bush said at his ranch in Crawford, Texas. "We're watching a political process unfold."

From his ranch in Crawford, Texas. It must be mighty terrifying on that ranch, sir. I'm sure you have your finger on the pulse of the nation from there.

He went on: "Terrorists will become more desperate, more despicable and more vicious," he said, while expressing confidence Iraq would continue to move toward democracy. more here.

As the October 15 vote approaches, tensions continue to mount between U.S. "peace-keeping" forces and insurgents who oppose the constitution. "The constitution will be defeated if two-thirds of voters in any three provinces reject the charter. Sunnis, though a minority in Iraq's overall population of 27 million, have the majority in at least four provinces." source: CNN. The situation doesn't look good from anywhere you stand. Though the transitional government did finish the constitution, there is still a mammoth task of building a working government from scratch still ahead. Let us also remember that if the constitution is defeated in October, the temporary government will be dissolved, and we'll start the whole escapade all over again.

While American news sources boast about the accomplishment of the constitution's finalization, foreign news sources are less than optimistic.

From the BBC in an article entitled, " Iraq charter a 'recipe for chaos:'"

Mr Moussa, of the Arab League, told the BBC's World Today programme: "I share the concerns of many Iraqis about the lack of consensus on the constitution." He said he was concerned that the draft text denies Iraq's "Arab identity" "I do not believe in this division between Shia and Sunni and Muslims and Christians and Arabs and Kurds," he said. "I don't buy this and I find in this a true recipe for chaos and perhaps a catastrophe in Iraq and around it."

Hold on to your seats, this is just getting interesting.

Canada becomes next world superpower?

Remember that pesky oil crisis? Alberta seems to have it solved, at least for the time being:

"At Suncor Energy's Millennium oil sands project, just north of Fort McMurray, Alta., the unmistakable odour of black gold drifts up from the ground and hangs thick in the air. Everywhere around you, water pooled in footprints, tire ruts and potholes carries the telltale rainbow sheen of oil. "The smell of economic progress," jokes Brad Bellows, a spokesman for Suncor, playing host on a damp spring afternoon. But it's much more than that. It's the smell of raw power -- the kind that comes from having plenty of what the rest of the world can't live without. It's the smell of a resource locked in the ground for millions of years and which now has the potential to shape the future of a nation, for better or for worse." more here.

What does this mean for U.S. energy, and furthermore, for the war in Iraq? I think we can safely assume that the United States' economy is going to avoid collapse yet again, thanks to oil reserves in the sands of Alberta and possibly the Arctic. Are we just delaying the inevitable though? The answer is a resounding, 'yes.'

There is far too much pressure from environmentalist groups around the world, as well as nations supporting the Kyoto Protocol for U.S. energy companies to start seriously tearing up ANWR - that is, until we reach a breaking point. Right now, our leaders are content to wage a holy war in Iraq to guarantee continued petroleum production from the Middle East - an area of the world that is already thoroughly entrenched in the industry. In the coming years, I believe we can expect to see steadily rising oil prices spurred on by rapidly increasing demand for petroluem. But if there is so much oil in North American reserves, why should we be worried at all?

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

We should be worried about the world's oil supply not only from an economic standpoint (as my previous article on the matter suggests,) but from an environmental view. Though we may not run out of oil completely for some time, we will continue to face troubling environmental issues in the meantime. For example, we've all heard the news about how awful greenhouse gases are. If you didn't already know, a fair amount of these gases are produced normally by the flora and fauna of the planet. These gases, mainly carbon dioxide, methane, and nitrous oxide, are recycled by the environment in what is known as the carbon cycle. The natural occurrence of greenhouse gases is only a small portion of the total, however.

A staggering 82% of greenhouse gas is carbon dioxide produced by the burning of fossil fuels, namely petroleum. The environment we have came pre-packaged with a nice self-regulating system for greenhouse gases. Since 1850 or so, humanity has increased the exhaust of greenhouse gases beyond the regular limits for the environment. As a result, we have experienced a rapid rise in global average temperature - about 4 degrees celsius in the last 150 years. 4 degrees is a big change, kids. The last major ice age boasts only a 5 degree average drop, and we generally regard that period in our earth's history as a drastically altered state of the planet.

So what's four lousy degrees anyway? Four degrees is enough to start seriously melting the polar ice caps, contributing to rising sea levels, cause hurricanes to set new records for strength, and decrease agricultural productivity throughout the Northern hemisphere. Additionally, we should also be on the lookout for another "little ice age" as experienced by Europeans during the middle part of the seventeenth century.

The sad sad truth

Even as more and more of the polar ice caps continue to melt away, there appears to be little to no alarm in the media. A positive spin is put on the story about the melting of the Arctic ice, claiming that the melting may (and will, in my opinion) open up the fabled, "Northwest Passage." Though the articles about the passage mention the environmental problems caused by the melting of the Arctic, I don't think they properly convey the real danger of the situation. We also seem to forget the rapidly disappearing Antarctic, another harbinger of imminent disaster. *One side note: the use of the word, 'imminent' refers to a larger time scale. While 50 years may be a long time for an individual, it is a blink of an eye on a geologic level. In 50 years when we are facing the flooding of low-lying coastal areas of the world, maybe we'll pay more attention to global warming.

The really unfortunate part about the problem is that hardly anyone seems to be paying attention. We're all too busy worrying about our own little problems which amount to nothing on a universal scale to bother thinking *gasp* fifty years ahead. Besides, we are fighting a war on 'terror' with no end in sight and our blinders secured tightly.

Again, it's a problem with religion. Many supporters of fossil fuel use are also, surprise, Christians. The book of Genesis states that the world and all the creatures in it exist so that man can subjugate them, and use them to his own ends. While that is a great idea to get early peoples pumped up about farming and growing as a race, it's not such a wonderful principle to follow in the year 2005 when there are more than 6 billion of us on this rock. It's time we abandoned this antiquated idea for something a little less harmful to the only planet we have.

Wake up and smell the carbon dioxide

We need to realize that we are alone here, together. On this planet, there are a multitude of different peoples with different agendas. Though what may be important to people in one part of the world isn't important to those in other parts, we should realize that the envrionment is everybody's concern. Without a stable environment, what will we have left to fight for? When we collectively send this planet to hell, who will be around to care whether Iraq becomes an Islamic republic anyway? Of course, no one will. We will all be scorched to death by the sun, uninhibited by the ozone layer, frozen by another epic ice age, flooded and overcrowded, and generally chewed up and spat out by a planet that has simply had enough of us. No amount of praying will ever keep us from our demise as a race. God didn't step in to help out the tsunami victims in Indonesia, nor did he divinely intervene to save Iranians during a landslide in 1990, or hundreds of thousands of Chinese in an earthquake in 1976. Nor will any supernatural power intervene to save the planet as a whole when it begins to seriously degrade and become less habitable for humanity.

I echo my previous posts when I say again, we need to be concerned with what is happening in the world: on economic, political, and environmental levels. We need to be aware of the things our "elected" leaders are doing to condemn us to struggle and hardship. If we don't start to open our eyes to actual important issues, I think we as a human race don't deserve the planet we've been given. Perhaps if we stopped going to churches and started going to science classes; if we stopped watching "Party at the Palms" and started watching "Washington Week;" if we stopped reading Stephen King, and started reading Noam Chomsky... Perhaps we would be better off.

I suppose it may be too much to ask of a society that turns out in larger numbers to vote for an American Idol than an American president, that we pay attention to things like the environment, or global politics. Maybe when this earth recycles itself (and humanity with it,) the universe will see a new species rise to power. Perhaps that species will do a little better job as the dominant force on the planet. Then again, what do I care? Tommy Lee Goes to College is on, and I can't miss that.

One for the home town crowd

Nestled in an alley between Church Street and High Street, Bruno's Pizza was the host to many shenanigans between 2000 and 2004. Sadly, this location no longer exists so when I go back to Oxford, good old Bruno's just won't be the same. At least Mac 'N Joe's will still be there (I hope.)